Mothers Learn From Her Children

This fun page is for all of the mothers of the world who lovingly try to teach their kids some of life’s most important lessons.

  • A 3 year-olds’ voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
  • If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough however to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.
  • You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
  • When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.
  • A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
  • The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
  • When you hear the toilet flush and the words “Uh-oh”, it’s already too late.
  • Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
  • A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.
  • A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
  • A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4 inches deep.
  • Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old. Duplos will not.
  • Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
  • Super glue is forever.
  • No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.
  • Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
  • VCR’s do not eject Peanut Butter & Jam sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
  • Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
  • Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
  • You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
  • Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
  • Plastic toys do not like ovens.
  • The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
  • It will however make cats dizzy
  • Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy

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