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91 Ways to Save on Almost Anything
Here's how to stretch your dollars -- and pinch your pennies 'til they scream -- while you feel little or no pain.
by Kiplinger's Personal Finance Magazine
Want to save a buck? How about a few hundred or a couple thousand?
read more...
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Fourth Week Of January
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Q:
"We met while going to school. Fell in love and I thought we would live forever together. We went out for 1 year and then things fell apart... I got pregnant. He left and I was caught between a broken heart and the fear of being a single mom. Had baby boy (whom is my true love). 2 years later guy shows up and wants time with his son. I put aside my broken heart and accepted the fact that we would never be. So, I did want my son to get to know his dad. It's been a few years now and my son still cries and cries for he does not want to go with his dad. His parents spend a lot of time watching my son and really not him. He has a girl friend now and every time her gets one he treats me like garbage. I have such feelings of anger, and frustration with guy. He's always pushing my button and trying to make me look like I'm some emotional freak. My son never want to go with him and when I get him back after the weekend my son tells me that he didn't want to come home to me. He has more fun with his dad (after saying his dad doesn't play with him). I am a wonderful mom and I work very hard to have the nice life my son I have today. It breaks my heart when my son tells me these things. He also says he want to live with his dad (he's only 6). This only happens the first day when he comes back after that my son can't have me out of his sight. He tells me that he's worried that the new girlfriend will take over for me. I told my son that I am his mommy forever and ever. I don't know what to say to my or what to do when he comes back with weird comments. I know his dad must tell him to say these things. I don't want my son to grow up all mixed up with his feelings. I just want him to be happy and I do want him to enjoy his visits with his dad (for his sake). What do I do with these comments of my son? What do I do with an ex that I can't even look at? Anelia"
A:
"In reply to Anelia, thank you for sending in your story. Reading it, I can feel the angry, frustration, disappointment and sadness in your letter. Anyone who is going through a situation like you, would feel the same way that you do. And I want you to know that you did a very RIGHT thing to allow your son to see his father. However, if the father doesn't treat your son right. You have the right to know what is going on with your son when here is there with his father's family.
You also did the RIGHT thing to raise your son on your own for two years. Where was the father? He wasn't around for his own son' sake. Now, did the father ever help you out with financially? Did he pay any child support at all? Well, if he doesn't and acts up like he is always there for your son. You can always contact the authority and someone will more than willing to assist you with what you should do.
The main thing here is how to raise your son right in a good environment, in a loving way, and a functional family. According to what you told me in the letter, I'm more worried about your son. And it seems like you do get the emotional get over you. To deal with the father and his family. You may want to be calm and I know it breaks your heart each time you hear your son makes weird comments toward you. I understand that as a mother, you have all the right to be angry over it.
Again, you were the one allowed the father came to your son's life again. You should be able to control your emotion. Please stay calm and play it cool with the father. Again, just like you said, for your son's sake! Your son deserves love, care, and support from you. If the father already tried to "brainwash' your son. It's not healthy at all for the child. The father tried to manipulate his own son... Imagine what will be the worst that he can do to your son? Again, you are not so sure, but you know the fact that your son acts all weird after each visit to his father's family.
I highly suggest that you should visit a doctor or a counselor and tell them what is going on with your son. you need to keep track to all this visit so that you have a proof for future use. You also should contact your local "child abuse" department to see if they can have a counselor to talk to your son. In that way, you will know what your son has been listened to each time he is with his father.
Remember, you are doing all this for your son and so do not let your emotion get over you. It's your choice of bringing this child to life, and because of that, raise and treat him the way he deserves it. Years from now, you will look back and you know that you did the right thing. And your son will always love you.
Take care and let me know how things go for you and your son. In the meantime, give your son a lot of love, caring, and support. Remind him that you miss him a lot each time he goes away and that you will always be there for him."
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back to Ask Single Mom Joy
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9 Cash-Saving Tips That Pay Big Bucks
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Short-term Payday Loans
econ4u.org
...Which are more expensive, late fees or short-term loans?...
A short-term payday loan can be a better option than overdraft fees, reconnect fees, late payment fees or a damaged credit rating when
the loan is repaid promptly. However, these loans are not suited for longer repayment periods...
Being realistic about budgeting can help avoid the need for short-term borrowing.
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Your Just-in-Case Emergency Plan
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Who do you call if you can't make it home in time to meet the kids' bus? Who do
you trust to take in your mail when you're on vacation? Who do you trust with
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If you were hoping for a list of small tweaks you could make in your spending to save $10,000 a year, sorry. The reality is that
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A quick reference guide designed for the busy, single mom who has
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Single mothers carry an enormous load of responsibility, especially those having sole and/or primary custody of minor children. They
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20 steps to protect yourself from identity theft, and seven ways to clean up things if you become a victim.
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