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 This
fun page is for all of the mothers of the
world who lovingly try to teach their kids
some of life's most important lessons.
A 3 year-olds'
voice is louder than 200 adults in a
crowded restaurant.
If you hook a dog
leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is
not strong enough to rotate a 42-pound
boy wearing Batman underwear and a
superman cape. It is strong enough
however to spread paint on all four
walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.
You should not
throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan
is on.
When using the
ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw
the ball up a few times before you get a
hit.
A ceiling fan can
hit a baseball a long way.
The glass in
windows (even double pane) doesn't stop
a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
When you hear the
toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh", it's
already too late.
Brake fluid mixed
with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
A six year old can
start a fire with a flint rock even
though a 36-year-old man says they can
only do it in the movies.
A magnifying glass
can start a fire even on an overcast
day.
A king size
waterbed holds enough water to fill a
2000 sq foot house 4 inches deep.
Legos will pass
through the digestive tract of a four
year old. Duplos will not.
Play Dough and
Microwave should never be used in the
same sentence.
Super glue is
forever.
No matter how much
Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you
still can't walk on water.
Pool filters do not
like Jell-O.
VCR's do not eject
Peanut Butter & Jam sandwiches even though TV
commercials show they do.
Garbage bags do not
make good parachutes.
Marbles in gas
tanks make lots of noise when driving.
You probably do not
want to know what that odor is.
Always look in the
oven before you turn it on.
Plastic toys do not
like ovens.
The spin cycle on
the washing machine does not make
earthworms dizzy.
It will however
make cats dizzy
Cats throw up twice
their body weight when dizzy
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