Home    •    Forum / Community    •    Free Offers     •     Classifieds     •     Gifting Program

Top

» Search

Techniques of an Identity Thief

Shiva Brent Sharma, who is serving a two- to four-year prison term, describes the techniques he used as an online identity thief.

read more



Madlynn is Kid of the Month

The Milk Gap



The Times's Jodi Kantor looks at the class divide for nursing mothers in the workplace.

read more...

Visits Don't Always Lead to Adoption



Programs that allow children available for adoption to visit American families often lead to happily-ever-after, but sometimes end painfully.

read more...

Taking Prescriptions on the Road



It is not required to carry copies of your prescriptions with you when you travel, but business travel columnist Joe Sharkey says it might not be a bad idea.

read more...

 

Consumer: top stories
 

Top

Single Moms - find here resources on financial aid, scholarships, help with basic needs, food, prescription drugs, health care, housing, legal info, and much more...


How to Turn Your Life Around with Powerful Thoughts

 

contributed by Jennifer Snyder

I hate to admit it now, but after my divorce, I spent more than one Sunday afternoon in bed playing “Uber-Damsel in Distress”. Growing older and wiser may result in a plethora of gray hair, but am I ever glad that those days are over.

 

A script similar to my own dramatic whining will follow later in this article.

 

This isn’t the first commentary I have written about acknowledging one’s power, but this is the first article I’ve penned with a film and scientific data to support my motivational claims.

 

We recently rented the movie, What The Bleep Do We Know.

 

At the core of this film are the provocative questions about the way we participate, consciously or not, in an unfolding reality. I found many parts of this movie to be fascinating, but the section that resonated most clearly for me was a part about the brain. You may not accept all of the scientists’ claims but if their points are valid, what I’m going to share with you can change your life.

 

The way I understand the theory about brain function in What The Bleep is that if we think a certain way for long enough, those connections between brain cells are strengthened and we automatically default to that way of thinking. Throughout our day, we make decisions about what events mean and what should be done about them. We aren’t required to make a new decision with each circumstance because with repeated experiences, our brain forms associations. Thus, if we accept limited power for long enough, we begin to automatically go through life as a victim.

 

If, however, we begin responding in a new way, we not only break free from victim thinking and experience happier outcomes, but we reprogram the connections between brain cells so that positive thinking is the direction in which they default. By choosing fresh, creative responses we truly begin to experience a more positive, powerful life.

 

Okay, let’s put this theory into Jennifer’s mournful role-play from a decade ago:

 

Setting: Darkened bedroom; our main character (the dramatic victim) is in bed, almost hidden by the covers over her head.

 

Plot: Our main character lives primarily in fear and agrees to anything her former husband demands because “he is powerful”, and she hates controversy. This latest dilemma is only more of the same in an endless cycle perpetuated by her limited beliefs.

 

Lights... camera... action.

 

And we roll:

 

“There’s nothing I can do. I can’t fight; he’s so powerful and can squash me like a bug. I know I’ve said it before, but there’s nothing I can do. Yes, I’ll probably lose the house and have to live under an overpass. Yes, even though I’m a great mother he may sway someone into believing my children shouldn’t live with me. Yes, I’ll probably grow old all by myself, and…”

 

Cut!

 

Couldn’t you almost hear those brain cells leaping into their familiar, defeatist patterns?

 

I warned you that it wasn’t pretty. Let’s get away from this angst.

 

But wait - before we shift our thinking and turn things around, I must admit that the next step isn’t an easy one. It will require you to pay attention to every reaction, and everything you say, for a while.

 

Back in the early 90s, I wasn’t blessed with the knowledge I’m sharing with you. I believe that courage, support, and experience gradually liberated me from my own limited beliefs. Otherwise, it would have taken that first stage of a rocket to launch this woman from her boudoir of despair.

 

But you have the luxury of current information. How can you rewrite your own script for powerful thinking, positive brain connections, and better results?

 

Still allowing for just a little drama, how about this reaction:

 

“Man, I would hate to be so unhappy that I had to express my authority in disagreeable ways. Okay, I’m not willing to give in to this demand but I can be a little more flexible in another area Let me return his call now so we can move beyond this difficulty. I am so grateful to have supportive friends who listen, and help me to problem solve. At least this relationship gave us wonderful children.”

 

New responses and realigned connections in your brain aren’t made overnight, but once they have been established, you’ll proclaim your power like never before.

 

About Author:

Jennifer Snyder, acclaimed life coach and workshop leader, women’s columnist, and tele-instructor has worked with almost 9,000 women across the United States. Her clients are separated and divorced women who cannot wait to proclaim their power. She is the author of a self-discovery workbook, The Time of Your Life: A Creative Sourcebook for Women. The Sourcebook can be ordered at www.timeofyourlifeafterdivorce.com.

 

Jennifer can be reached at 919/414-7197 or visit her Web site at www.timeofyourlifeafterdivorce.com.

Top

Top 8 Tips for Reducing Kids Screen Time This Summer

Reducing time spent in front of televisions and computers is one of the easiest ways to improve your family's health. Here are eight simple ways to limit screen time so you can help crank up your kids’ energy, re-charge their minds, and improve their health.

read more...

What would you change?

Weekly Column, by Annette Bridges

Change -- some people dread it, and others can’t get enough. It may be much like the idiom, “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.” When it comes to what we would alter or why we would make a modification, the answers vary because we all have different things we value, want, need and consider important.

read more...

Being a Role Model

by Laurie Cesario-Overton

If I had to choose one sentence that would best describe what I feel parents need to learn, it would be this: Be your child's BEST ROLE MODEL in all the ways that truly count. Be your child's HERO. Whatever you do, do it for all the right reasons.

read more...

How to Find the Best Car Loans for Single Moms

Financial Advice for Single Moms

The best car loans for single mothers might be just around the corner at your local car lot.

read more...

3 Money Rules for Stay-at-Home Moms

As we all know, life is unpredictable. We lose jobs, get divorced and even become widowed...
Here are three steps stay-at-home parents should take to better manage their own and the family’s finances.

read more...

You May Have Too Much Debt But You Also Have Options

How Life Works

If you feel like you're in over your head with personal debt, you're not alone. Millions of Americans have become overextended, many as a result of easy credit and the recessions. Credit cards, medical bills, personal loans and raising interest rates do not make a good financial mix.

read more...

Could fat babies mean fat toddlers?

A new study from Harvard Medical School found that babies who gained weight quickly had a sharply higher risk of obesity. The study followed close to 600 babies and found those in the top quarter of weight for their length at 6 months had a 40 percent higher risk of obesity by age 3 than smaller babies.

read more...

Crystal Bowersox - A Single Mom And A Real American Idol

Read how the amazing Crystal Bowersox. the runner-up of American Idol Season 9, handles fame and life as a single mom, raising her 17 month old son.

read more...

5 Ways for Single Moms to Save Money

Single moms are always looking for ways to save money, and for good reason... It’s important to find ways to cut corners on the little things that perhaps you don’t think about too often, because those are usually where your biggest money drains are.

read more

Suze Orman's Recession Rescue Plan - helps you survive in times of financial crisis

OPRAH.com

Do you know what your family would do if you lost your job - or worse, your home? Financial expert Suze Orman is ready to help you devise a recession rescue plan to survive - and possibly thrive - during this deepening financial crisis...

read more...

Your Just-in-Case Emergency Plan

by RealSimple

Who do you call if you can't make it home in time to meet the kids' bus? Who do you trust to take in your mail when you're on vacation? Who do you trust with the extra set of keys to your house?

read more...

How to save $10,000

By Liz Pulliam Weston

If you were hoping for a list of small tweaks you could make in your spending to save $10,000 a year, sorry. The reality is that $10,000 is a lot of money. And saving big money usually means making big changes in the areas where we spend the most, such as: Housing, Transportation, Food.

read more...

The Super, Sexy, Single Mom on a Budget

by Renee Rayles

A quick reference guide designed for the busy, single mom who has

little time to read while running the mom taxi, cooking dinner, helping with homework, and trying to fit in a date night every now and then.

read more...

Single Mothers &
Male Role-Models / Mentors

Single mothers carry an enormous load of responsibility, especially those having sole and/or primary custody of minor children. They nourish, they nurture, they teach, they discipline, they shelter, they protect, and they provide… all without the assistance of another equally-invested adult.

read more...

Mom's Obesity Raises Newborn's Heart Risk

from the National Institute of Health

The more obese a woman is when she becomes pregnant, the greater the likelihood that her newborn baby will have a congenital heart defect, a new study suggests. The finding raises concerns because 1 in 5 women are obese at the start of pregnancy in the United States.

read more...

The 10-Ingredient Shopping Trip

By Tara Parker-Pope and Mark Bittman

... In his latest “How to Cook Everything” segment on the Today Show, New York Times food writer Mark Bittman makes it surprisingly easy to cook a week’s worth of dinners with just a 10-ingredient shopping trip.

read more...

Your 5-minute guide to protecting your identity

20 steps to protect yourself from identity theft, and seven ways to clean up things if you become a victim.

read more...

TheOnlineMom.com offers parents and consumers a guide to the top-rated, age-appropriate, kid-tested and parent-approved tech toys and gifts.

read more...

Single Moms in the News

6 Best Celebrity Single Moms
Read about Halle Berry, Sandra Bullock, Michelle Williams, Reese Witherspoon, Kimora Lee Simmons, Mary-Louise Parker... read more

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Last Straw

by Jeff Kinney

For those wondering why tween boys don’t read very much, the answer is that more books aren’t like this...

read more...

Top

SingleMom.com™ Pages:   Home  •  About SingleMom.com™  •  Privacy Policy  •  Contact us

SingleMom.com™ Features:   Forum / Community  •  Free Offers  •  Classifieds  •  Gifting Program

SingleMom.com™ Sections:   Ask “Joy”  •  Education & Career  •  Help for Moms in Need  •  Housing  •  Kid Stuff  •  Parenting  •  Day to Day  •  Health & Well Being  •  Cooking & Recipes  •  Legal Issues  •  Finances

© 2005-2010 SingleMom.com™, Sponsored by Internet Genesis™ company, All Rights Reserved.
Revised: 26 July 2010.