Children and very sensitive and usually get involved in a very short time on an emotional level with people associated with you. As a mother you would not want to expose the kids to any emotional turmoil by having them meet a man who might not stay for very long in their life. It is therefore very important that you are careful about the men that you date and also mindful about introducing them to your kids.
Here are a few tips on when to introduce your date to the kids and also how to go about the introduction:
- Right time – There is no one perfect time that suits everyone when it comes to introducing the kids to your date. While in a certain case the kids maybe open to meeting the guy on the first date itself, in another situation it may not be right to make introductions till several months later. As a mother it is important that you understand the nature of your kids. Depending on their age, it is best that you keep them informed that you are dating but make introductions only once you are sure that the gentleman in question is going to be a part of your life in the coming future. Of course you should be well aware of the background of your date and also very sure that the man does not pose any threat to your kids in any way.
- Never force – In case the kids do not wish to meet your date, don’t force them and also vice versa. The two parties should meet each other only when both of them are comfortable with the introduction. In any case there is bound to be some hostility in this meeting and if you force any one, the situation will only get worse. Let both the sides know how important the kids and your date is in your life and then give them some time to adjust with the fact. Once they are ready to meet each other, and then go ahead with the introductions.
- Comfort – When you introduce a man to the kids, they are bound to think that their father has been replaced and this may make them bitter and a bit sad too. Make sure you have explained to them that their father is special to them and that you are not looking to replace him. Comfort the kids and let them know that they are not forced to like the man that they meet, but you would like them to give him a fair chance. Similarly, make sure you do not come down too hard on your date in case the kids and he do not get along.
When introducing the man in your life to the kids several safeguards are necessary. It is important that the child’s welfare is the most important thing, and that it is fully protected. This welfare should be the yardstick with which you judge the right time and the right man that you need to introduce to the kids.