Children lie and there are some studies that go to show that kids who do lie are known to grow into more intelligent and resourceful adults. While some incidents of lying should not worry you, it can be a problem in case you find that your kid is lying to you very often and even in cases where the matter is serious.
It is important to understand why you child is lying to you and break this pattern. Some tips below will help in this area:
- Out of fear – Children will often lie out of fear and your kid could be doing the same thing. Maybe you have gone overboard in your strictness and the child fears you too much to tell you anything that she fears you will not like. Here the need is for you to develop a better and more casual relationship with your child. Inspire faith in the kid and let her see that she benefits when she tells the truth no matter how ugly it is.
- Habitually – Some kids will lie out of habit. Their lies have no motives at all and they will simply say the wrong thing for the heck of it. So a simple answer to something like have you had breakfast or did you have a good time or did you sleep well, can be answered with a lie. In most cases these kids are testing how far they can go with their lies and you may need to deal with this properly. It is important to explain to the child that lying to you will make you loose faith in the kid and there will come a time when you will not believe anything she says. This talk must be reinforced as often as possible and with several examples so that the child learns that lying is not a game and corrects her habit of lying.
- Serious problems – Kids can also begin to lie if they are going through some serious problem. Addictions are a known to often be a cause of kids starting to lie to their parents. Here you will need to adopt a very well laid out plan of action. First and foremost you have to ensure that the child has indeed fallen into an addiction trap. The next move will be intervention and then seeking treatment for the problem. Do understand that a large part of this treatment will also involve building a relationship between you and the kid that is free of lying and cheating.
Everyone lies sometime or the other, but a person who lies often is no ones cup of tea. It is important that we understand why our kid is lying to us instead of simply reprimanding the child for lying. Understanding why the kid feels the need to lie will also help us to choose the right path in correcting this behavior and ensuring that the kid grows up to be a more honest and truthful adult.